Thursday, May 9, 2013

Thirty Things In Post-Apocalyptic New York

(Roll D30)

1. Dead pigs wrapped around dead cows.

2. Airport surrounded by dead trees.

3. Buildings trying to crush each other.

4. Hotel with gleaming (possibly stolen) modernist fixture retrofitted onto a totally neglected frame with duct tape and 2x4s.

5. D4 fat cops, tell PCs that they should keep their hands out of their pockets and that they resemble comic book characters that they don't actually resemble.

6. An artist hanging an art show while being interrupted by telephone calls and a vomiting dog.

7. Grubby sausage-shaped San Rio purse.

8. Socks with holes in them.

9. Unexpected gift from NPC (roll d4) (1) A female barbarian unexpectedly delivers 200 donuts and with serving wenches. (2) Dr Pepper (3) Homemade temporary tattoos (4) Slightly used womens' underwear

10. A formal dinner: the guests discuss the Laurel Canyon Conspiracy

11. A cybernetic elephant.

12. A machine gun vending machine.

13. A wall-crawling mutant helps a disoriented woman descend stairs.

14. It appears to be a library but its actually a bar. The bartender belongs to a family that breeds genetically engineered animals. Someone in the bar knows the PCs by their deeds and has slept with the same people.

15. A jealous god slays the World's Fastest Fingers and the Originary Puppetmaster.

16. Actress known for clown porn and blood porn getting in her 5th car crash.

17. People eating cheeseburgers after screaming about death.

18. Man-scorpions holding a midget king prisoner in the center of the ruined city.

19. Behind a featureless room: Another room filled with pheasants, owls and songbirds.

20. Aliens and cripples atop a tall building in the center of the city.

21. Pornographers discussing art history in a japanese living room.

22. Cocaine addicts: (d4) 1-Enemies of PCs 2- Friends of PCs 3-Friends of friends of PCs 4-Power brokers

23. Intellectuals from opposing gangs negotiating a treaty.

24. Dissidents occupying the president's office.

25. A man named "Panther".

26. A woman being filmed while reading a novel and being sexually stimulated covertly by machines.

27. A man giving his car away to a whore for crack--for the second time.

28. A religious zealot being ignored on a train platform

29. Three people watching a video of millions of people watching a man have sex with a pig.

30. A grandmother sending a care package of apocalypse-damaged memorabilia to her son.
Photo: Clayton Cubitt


  1. Isn't that just before-apocalypse New York?

  2. Where is the cabbie? NY isn't NY without a cabbie.

  3. Speaking of New York, I saw you walking down 6th Avenue yesterday. I would have said "Hi, I'm a big fan." Except I didn't have a follow up to that. And you were already talking to someone. And I was on my way to meet my lady. Just thought you should know.

  4. Is it a vending machine that dispenses machine guns or a machine gun style vending machine dispensing Snickers the way Richard Gatling intended?

  5. 6 Things in Post-Apocalyptic Margate:

    1 d4+1 kids searching for treasure in a pile of dogshit on the beach

    2 A bright-haired angel delivering a cake with the PCs names on it

    3 Two old guys yelling at each other across the street; despite them obviously talking in the local dialect it is incomprehensible even to someone who has lived locally for 25 years.

    4 A mechanical elephant that contains a pub which, though obviously designed to fleece tourists, is actually quite pleasant

    5 A toy crane claw machine that delivers cute cuddly toys with their eyes sewn up

    6 A burnt out building that was formerly protected by the town council

    Bonus: An art gallery run by a creature made entierly of knitted tentacles and sombreros. Sombreroes? I don't know.

  6. Hi guys !!!!

    I just "post to watch" I discovered this website searching for "anime cyborg", but it's incredible that I am a D&D master and I play from late 2001. I live in Venice, Italy.

    In the next weeks, I'll look this blog because I really like your idea, and I also love sex & D&D. Explosive combination.

    I want to share with you this song/video:

    I will search for an email of you in the next weeks, because I have a good collection of D&D images (as a master) to share with you as a zipfile, I see that you have a very good aesthetic sense while posting your pictures.

    Hi Zak and Mandy !
    thanks for this blog.