Preamble To Weird Thing I Have To Ask You About:
Sometimes people want to know how I manage to make art full time, occasionally write a book or "perform" in a porn movie, DM games, direct, edit and produce a web tv show about some of those games while also leaving time to read all these goddamn gameblogs.
One of my time-saving techniques is: if I feel like reading stuff on-line, I cut the text, paste it into a note in the Stickies utility of my Mac and then press "Edit">"Speech">"Start Speaking". Then the program starts reading the text out loud to me (usually while I draw or paint or something) in a sort of Stephen Hawking voice.
I think the most recent verison software has something subtle programed into it--it's improved over earlier versions and doesn't sound quite as wooden as these things used to. It also has weird quirks like it'll sometimes say "Gygax" and sometimes say "Jigg-axe" . I'm not sure, but I think there's something in there designed to make the autoreader sense the inflection of the sentence.
The Weird Thing:
Go to Jeff's post about his World of Cinder game.
Cut this bit:
(orcish arrows pepper the party)
Anyanna (quickly pulling on mask): Wait! Don’t shoot!
Orc #1: Who are you? What tribe are you with?
Amyanna: Uh… the Oonga Boonga tribe!
Orc #1: Hey, Lenny! Are we at war with the Oonga Boonga tribe?
Orc #2: What tribe aren’t we at war with? Mort, you ever heard of an Oonga Boonga tribe?
Orc #3: Can’t say that I have.
Reginald: Sleep spell!
Other PCs: Stabbity stabbity!
Paste it into Stickies.
Have Stickies read it to you.
Does you computer laugh after the line "What tribe aren't we at war with?"?
My computer fucking laughed. It has been reading stuff to me for months and has never laughed before, but I swear to god it fucking laughs at that line. Every time.
Try it. The little menu tells me I've got Stickies version 7.0.
5 hours ago