Friday, March 19, 2010

Appendix C: Whores

I know lots of people hate it when I post non-game stuff here, but I figure I just posted a whole thing on all the monsters starting with D today, so I've earned it.

Some confusion has arisen concerning nomenclature, allow me to explain:

Most people decide that they want to have sex with you before having sex with you

Whores decide they don't want to have sex with you before having sex with you,

Porn performers decide whether they want to have sex with you while having sex with you.


Note: Overlap has been known to occur. Some Porn Performers are known to never have any fun, and so are--practically speaking--Whores, while some have other sources of income or fairly high rates and so have the luxury of behaving like Most People.

For more information on porn stars and whores, visit your local library.


  1. This just reminds me what a hilarious disaster being single was.

  2. While I am not 100% certain on the genesis of this post I can make an educated guess.

    Sorry man.
    Most people are assholes, and even more are assholes exclusively online. They are just jealous.

  3. You skipped straight from "D" to "W"! No wonder the internet hates this blog! ;)

  4. Isn't it funny how most people can detach their emotions from a task they don't like, yet must do (either for money or necessity); while the same folks cannot detach their emotions from tasks they do enjoy, yet must also do (either for money or necessity)?

    It just goes to show you that hedonism is WAY more common in the human species than they would like to admit.

    Great Blog, Zak. Congrats on the web series, as well. FIGHT ON!

    (Ironic word verification concerning this blog: thogrand)


  5. Unfortunately, I'm not particularly good looking, talented or erotically skilled, so I went to work in an office with the rest of the whores.

  6. You say what you're here to say, you do what you're here to do.
    If people have a problem with irrelevancies. it's _their_ problem, and they are signalling in a very loud and roundabout way that they have absolutely nothing meaningful to add.
    Onwards and upwards.

  7. "For more information on porn stars and whores, visit your local library." This is the funniest thing I have seen today.

  8. Yeah I forwarded that quote to a friend of mine. She is a librarian and once caught some college kids having sex in a study room.

  9. Wasn't aware I could find porn stars and whores at my local library. I've been looking in all the wrong places. Thanks Zak. This is an excellent public service announcement.

  10. Between the 'Librarian' fetish and the saying 'It's always the quiet ones.' I SHOULD be able to come up with a funny comment here, but I just can't. I know I'll ask the Internet to do it for me!

  11. Reminds me of the old saw, "A slut does it with anyone. A Bitch does it with anyone but you."

  12. I read the title and thought this post was about the random prostitute table in the 1E DMG. I'll take a Brazen Strumpet, please!