Thursday, February 11, 2010

Some Pics Satine Took, Plus A Random Treasure Table

So these are from last week when Justine flew in and played.
The reason Kimberly looks like she showed up to play just after auditioning for the role of a porn version of Maude Lebowski is because she showed up to play just after auditioning for the role of a porn version of Maude Lebowski.
(She got it.)
(She also just won Best Actress again, this time at the XBiz Awards, even though they didn't let her in.)

Left to right--Carrion Crawler, (or Rot Grub, if you work at Reaper miniatures and are worried about copyright), Kimberly (on top), Justine (red-head), Connie disguised as a goblin, Mandy, Satine. Frankie was off hiding somewhere (as usual.)

I feel bad about posting a blog full of fluff, so here's a random chart I just now made up...

Treasure Table For When You Realize There Should Be Treasure In a Room But It Hadn't Occurred To You To Write It Up In Advance


1. Gold statuette of a piglet. Is actually a real piglet encased in gold. The piglet is immortal.
2. d4x100 g.p.
3. Looks like a healing potion but it's actually a love potion. Drink it and fall in love with whoever last wounded you.
4. Roll twice.
5. Small carved figurine or chess piece of one of the PCs, precise in every detail, 25-28mm tall. Purpose unknown.
6. d10 x 100 living snails that have been pulled out of their real shells and given specially-made ones cast from pure silver. Each shell is worth 1 s.p. Snails are sentient, communicate telepathically, and will beg PCs not to do pretty much any of the things a PC would want to do with them.
7. An assortment of 10 gems apparently worth d4x100 gp total, 5 are cursed (each in a different way), 5 bless the owner with magical properties (each in a different way). The 5 curses are precisely the opposite of the 5 bonuses and they cancel each other out. Getting rid of any one of the gems will cause its opposite to take effect
8. Small ruined copper golem, about 2 feet tall.
9. Small, elaborately carved stone sphere (or wheel) about half the size of a bowling ball. It can be used as a hamster wheel or hamster ball, however--if any being larger than a cat is shrunk by magical means and placed inside the ball or wheel and begins to move, the creature becomes unstoppable--able to roll through walls and obstacles as if they were cobwebs.
10. This:

18 comments:

vaudeviewgalor raandisisraisins said...

6. escargot for the brain. teach 'em chance/math and let 'em fix games for pubcrawl.

you could do a lot of win damage with some good placing.

spielmeister said...

Uh, what exactly is item no. 10? I'm actually afraid to find out. :)

MercerMachine said...

#3: Just plain wrong.

BigFella said...

@ spielmaster
That's a double horned sea unicorn skull

ze bulette said...

I must say, I am vary partial to silver ensconced escargot. Still, the immortel de porc intriques - an endless supply of trotters you say, following the initial roasting (to remove the pesky, flavor detracting gold)..? Or, if one feels particularly cruel, fresh bacon every morning? Truly a treasure!

Word verification: Hamel

Matthew Slepin said...

Wait, wait: who's Justine? I feel like I know your from from your excellent AP posts, but now I feel like I missed something.

fishlemons said...

very cool!
although, at first i read that "The piglet is immoral." and that seemed wonderfully absurd and made me spray coffee onto the blanket.
very amusing

Zak S said...

bogfella-
you're a genius this week

matthew-
justine joli--she doesn;t live in LA, so this was her first game with us

fishlemons
that would've been way cooler. i wish i could write like that on purpose

Robert H. Nichols said...

You know, fluff is cool too. But that is definitely a worthyu treasure table to get copied into my stuff. Especially when i want to cause lots of chaos.

BTW, what is that #10? Seriously. No i mean it, seriously.

Ursca said...

It's a two-tusked narwhal skull, à la this

Ursca said...

(Curse the lack of an edit button)
Incidentally, if you read this, Zak, the last couple of links in your 'Greatest Hits' sidebar are broken.

Zak S said...

ursca--
They work for me--
one problem i've noticed about this blog on firefox is that someimes when you click on it, it takes you to the "adult content warning" page but it takes you to the LOWER HALF of that page, which is totally blank, so it looks like there's nothing on the screen.

maybe that's the problem--or maybe it's just a hiccup.

Ursca said...

Strange. The link URL for the last link is this for me, which gives me a 404 due to the "http://www.blogger.com/http//" bit. It's the same in both firefox and chrome.
And also after clearing my cache.

Matthew Slepin said...

Ah. Is she the red-head in the quiz?

So what does she play? That's always an interesting bit for me.

Zak S said...

matthew--
well, since nobody won the quiz i can tell you--half-orc wizard

Matthew Slepin said...

Now that I would not have guessed.

BigFella said...

@Zak S

Heh... Bogfella. Now there's a monster of some kind waiting to be statted up.

Random animal factoid: The narwhal's "horn" is actually a big weird tooth. Seems like the kind of thing that could go on a random mutation chart if one had that sort of thing in one's game.

brady said...

Hang on a second. In the bottom photo...is that a mixtape?