Going To See The Sage Should Be Awesome

The sage knows the thing that the party wants to know about. They're gonna want to visit the sage.

But here's the other thing: if you don't know about the thing the party wants to know about yet, because you haven't decided, then a great way to put off the decision for a session or two is to build an adventure around the sage.

Here are some tables for making sages, plus a few made using those tables down at the end.

Why Is Seeing the Sage Difficult? (d100)

1-10 Hermit in the jungle seething with beasts

11-20 Hermit on a mountain crawling with critters

21-30 Hermit in the forest carbuncled with creatures

31-34 Hermit on an isle where the sea teems with terrors 

35-37 Prisoner of a powerful potentate

38-40 Prisoner of traveling troublemakers

41-43 Prisoner in a deep dungeon beneath the earth

44-46 Prisoner of a rival power

47-48 Is a rival power

49-52 No-one knows who the sage is but they’re somewhere in this…

(49)…city

(50)…dungeon

(51)…castle

(52)…ship’s crew

53-57 They’re in the city but it’s a whole Raymond Chandler novel trying to find them

58-68 They’re right there but they won’t give up the information for money, they want you to go on some fetch quest.

69-73 They’re just a dick and will fight you or test you in some gatekeepy way like Pai Mei in Kill Bill 

74-76 They’re a fucked-up high-level wizard with all that implies

77-78 They speak in literal riddles so getting your answer requires figuring out some puzzle

79 They are stuck in another dimension

80 Super greedy so the price of your information is high enough the PCs need to go do some other adventure first

81-85 They are paranoid and too distracted to answer their door so they live in a wacky trap house

86 They are paranoid or just really dotty so you have to get past some dangerous jackass who doesn’t like anyone to get to talk to them

87 They think the knowledge is dangerous and want to test whether you are safe/moral/noble/smart enough to wield it properly

88 They’ve been replaced by an evil twin/clone/duplicate/master of disguise or just a liar because its the middle ages and photos haven’t been invented

89 They’re a thief or murderer or something and mistakenly think you’re here to take them in

90 They don't speak any language the party knows or can know

91-00 Roll twice, rerolling results you can’t make work together

Intelligence

14+d4

Wisdom

10+d8

Languages

In the LotFP style--where Languages Skill is a # out of 6--Sages have d8 minus 2 languages skill, with 0 and negative results being treated as 1.

In any system where languages are instead enumerated individually assume the sage speaks d12 minus 2 languages, with negative results being treated as 1.

Intellectual Specialties (d20)

Sages also have a number of specialties equal to their intelligence bonus—when it comes to rolling to see if they know things about their specialty, treat this as a skill with a 6/6 rating (They know it unless they roll 2d6 and get double sixes). 

1 Magic/Arcana

2 The Ocean

3 Religions

4 Plants (Bushcraft 6/6)

5 Animals

6 History and literature

7 Statecraft and war

8 Food and drink

9 Architecture (Assume the skill is 6/6)

10 Disease and healing (can heal 1hp on the first day and d4 every day thereafter)

11 Supernatural monsters

12 Politics and Rulers in the area

13 Sage is actually a mystic oracle with cleric level 2+d4

14 Sage is actually a mystic oracle with cleric level 2d6

15 Sage is actually a mystic oracle with cleric level 2d10

16 Anthropology of a foreign human culture

17 Demianthropology of a nonhuman culture

18 Engineering, tools and materials (Tinkering 6/6)

19 Fashion and garments

20 The mind and madness

Personal Protection (d20)

1 Roll twice

2 Short sword

3 Poison ring

4 Small blowgun

5 Knows martial arts (unarmed strike for d4)

6-7 Sling

8-9 Light crossbow

10-15 Staff

16-18 Knife

19-20 None

Gender (d20)

1-4 Bald male

5-7 Long-haired male

8 Male with bad hair

9 Male with awesome hair

10-14 Female with bad hair

15-17 Female with great hair

18 Bald female

19 Nobody knows 

20 Local nonbinary variant

Basic Appearance (d20)

1-2 Skinny old weirdo

6-10 Fat old weirdo

11-14 Mesomorphic old weirdo

15 Super-hot for some reason?

16-17 Just some girl/guy/they but glasses

20 Creepy child savant

Vibes (d20)

1-4 Bookish and pedantic

5-7 Warm, generous and long-winded

8-9 Alert and excitable, says “fascinating” a lot

10-11 Enigmatic and portentous

12 Pretty chill

13-15 Cranky and irascible

16-18 Drunk and friendly

19 Drunk and mean

20 High and spacey

What Else Is Up With The Sage? (d20—roll twice)

1 Some kind of physical abnormality like a missing eye or big scar 

2 They’re actually a kung fu master so fighting them is a huge pain

3 They are solid on the main thing they know but will volunteer little bits of fake information for fun like tell you horse sweat is great for your skin

4 They hate everyone

5 They talk reallllllly slow especially when about to say something important

6 Roll until you have three total results from this table

7-8 Elf 

9 Dwarf

10 Halfling

11 Half-orc or other nonhuman

12 They want to hang out with you from now on

13 They’re sweet on a PC

14 They’re conjoined twins

15 Pervert

16 They want the PCs to know the thing in order to enact their own secret villain plan

17 Has a pet and they want you to love it

18 Will actually teach you stuff so if the party lets them hang around they all get a bonus in something next time they level up

19 They want the PC’s help escaping from some tyrannical jerk who is forcing them to do something boring or evil

20 They have some kooky utopian enterprise they want to inveigle the PCs into helping them with which will require some fetch quests

Some Sages

Assume all sages have an 18 Int when it comes to their specialty subjects as well as maximum skill in any area related to their specialty, like if they're an expert in Architecture, their Architecture skill is 6/6.

Any stats not listed are average.

Veltys of the Broken Teeth

Int 16

Wis 15

Language skill 2/6

Restorer of the Eminent Cathedral, credited with planning the near-victory over the goblin princes at the Fret Crossin and alleged poisoner of Oolthid the Cleverer, Veltys of the Broken Teeth has served as advisor to heads of the great houses of Vornheim since before they were young.

As such, she is a difficult woman to see, or even locate. But she lives in the city, and what she knows, she knows very well.

People like Veltys exist only on the end of a long chain of guys who know a guy. Finding Veltys for the first time will require consulting at least four denizens of Vornheim in four separate locations, at least 3 of whom will be sketchy and at least two of whom will be hostile.

Her expertise is in statecraft, war, architecture, and useful plants, she carries a knife.

Despite her forbidding appearance and the layers of intrigue that suround her, she is in truth fascinated by intellectual puzzles of all kinds, and will be eager to join adventurers if they present her with an exciting problem or a chance to see something new. 

Rabbi Oplich

Int 15

Wis 16

Language skill 5/6

The Common Man's Scholar, He of the Heavy Hat, Rabbi Oplich has been doling out shrewd and well-weighed advice on the wonders of the world since the days of the False Incursion. Anyone seeking assistance with a curse, enchantment, or puzzling magic item may come to his comfortable but modest home on the shores of Lake Pyrolisk ("It's just a name" he shrugs) and ask questions of the learned rabbi.

However, before he plunges into the papery depths of his chaotic library, the great man will ask for some service--generally the retrieval of some rare artifact which he believes might benefit the community. Or go well with brisket. Once it is secured, he will answer questions.

As devotees of the Hebraic faith are not universally appreciated, he carries a short sword.

He is impatient with careless thinkers and forever quoting authorities from the unknowable past--often ones with conflicting opinions--however, if an adventuring party is useful and interesting, he will not only accompany them on adventures, but will teach useful skills, if only to avoid being annoyed by the party's ignorance: all PCs accompanied by the Rabbi when they level up will gain a one time, permanent +1 to checks involving arcana and wizards and clerics can gain a one-time bonus of 1000xp if the Rabbi is accompanying them when they level up.

Orn Undyyn

Int 18

Wis 18

Language skill 5/6

Perilous it is to consult the purple-robed eminence known as Orn Undyyn. Though possessed of the powers of a 17th-level cleric and 19th-level wizard, Undyyn is devoted almost exclusively to the magics of awareness and augury. It is said that Undyyn knows all there is to know of animals, the future, foreign nations, and the arts of garment-making.

Although affecting the sneering contempt one might expect from one of such vast powers, many are drawn to the chambers of oracle, and are susceptible to Undyyn's charms. Undyyn toys with visitors, and the crepuscular marble of Undyyn palace is rich with traps, creatures and puzzles. Anyone who successfully navigates this place will be granted an audience with the oracle, though the consultation they receive will always be calculated to serve Undyyn's own purposes.

The Plum-Eating Scholar

Int 17

Wis 16

Language skill 3/6

HD 6 HP 24 Speed 120' (incl. climbing or swimming) Armor 15 Morale 9 Attacks +6 to hit d4 knife

The Plum-Eating Scholar is a 6th-level cleric of Nyaa, of the Two Temperaments, and an expert on the ocean, and on the merfolk, mantamen, and other nations who dwell beneath it. He speaks in slow riddles and fends off all dangers with the deft flick of his whalebone blade.

Although eager to share the secrets of the sea, The Plum-Eating scholar is currently stranded in The Forest of Grasping Trees on the Plane of Shadow. He will be grateful if rescued, though no less enigmatic. 

Niola Lood

Int 16

Wis 13

Language Skill 2/6

Part-halfling, part-elf, Niola Lood has spent her entire life studying the flora, creatures and cultures of the enchanted wood.

Although generally possessed of an easygoing manner, anyone seeking her counsel will have to past her puckish tests, devised not only to entertain her, but to test the querent's cleverness, and their respect for growing things. She generally watches from a nearby perch, while drinking firefly mead and shouting incorrect advice.

She carries a light crossbow in case of trouble.