Vornheim Campaign Index

This is quite fucking useful:

Matt Strom over at the Ice And Ruin blog has created (all by his lonesome without telling me) an index of all the world-material entries for my D&D game that are on this blog--everything from the Maidenmother Crone to the Jade Fang of Tiamat and all that.

With over 1000 entries on this blog, it can be hard to sort through this stuff.

Thanks Matt!

In The Half-Court

(shockingly, not about basketball)

Me and Patrick are working on some kind of Anti-Camelot project...
Part One
Part Two
Part Three:

Humans say there is no law in the Half-Court of the Half-King where the half-elves thrive, but there is--and it is that everything must happen sometimes.

Crimes must be punished half the time--but half the time they must not. Treaties must be half-honored, women half-respected, children half-raised, dangerous magic half-banned. The genetic chimeras prowl the half-sown fields and swim the hot and then cold again waves.

The passionate and unreliable King Thanacharis would call himself True Neutral--but this in no way suggests the abstractedness of the modron, serene remove of the druid, or the selfishness of those who give no fucks. His knights come on hybrid horses to fuck your mom and send her roses, then eat her whole and buy you shoes. Their net goal is to cancel themselves out, like youtube comments. Wildly that and then wildly this--seeking zero, signifying nothing.

Any half-elf is welcome in the half-land. Half choose to live in that half-enlightened land of half-seelie and half-unseelie laws, and half prefer to remain diasporic, welcomed widely, but home nowhere.

They are trouble half the time--which is a lot if you think about it.

Strange Characteristics of the Half-Knights
Roll d100 until the knight's characteristics cover overlapping domains (14 and 15 for example, or 3 and 90, or 9 and 11) or the knight becomes too complicated to keep track of

1, Invulnerable Sunday, Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday morning
2, Invincible at night
3, Invincible by day
4, Invulnerable from the right
5, Invulnerable in half-light
6, Invulnerable every other round
7, Invulnerable every other day
8, Only there half the time
9, Touch reduces/raises you to half hit points
10, Half-mad, half-genius
11, Left hand cures the same amount of damage the right deals
12, Radiates indecision
13, Friendly every other round
14, Zebra-skinned of dark and pale
15, Two beings, divided down the center
16, Despised by their own mount half the time
17, Knight on one round, wizard the next
18, Immune to anything middle-gray to black
19, Immune to anything white to middle gray
20, Immune to anything a cold color
21, Immune to anything a warm color
22, Invulnerable when attacking a position
23, Invulnerable when defending one
24, Obedient to their liege on alternate days
25, Chivalrous one round, corrupt the next
26, Can only roll 1s and 20s
27, S:18  I:3 W:18 Cn:3 Ch:18 D:3
28, S:3  I:18 W:3 Cn:18 Ch:3 D:18
29, S:18  D:18 Cn:18 I:3 W:3 Ch:3

30, S:3  D:3 Cn:3 I:18 W:18 Ch:18

31, Every other word is elvish the other half are common

32, Takes two steps forward, two back, never gets anywhere
33, Smites as a standard paladin one round, as an oathbreaker the next
34, Aura of healing one round, damage the next
35, Immune to magic and magic weapons one round, immune to ordinary weapons the next
36, Blessing aura one round, Curse aura the next
37, Aura of healing on the left, aura of damage on the right
38, Immune to magic and magic weapons on the left, immune to ordinary weapons from the right
39, Blessing aura on the left, Curse aura on the right
40, Blind on one round, x-ray & dark vision the next
41, Invisible by day, Faerie Fire'd at night
42, Silence aura one round, causes painful din the next
43, Smells corrupt and then sweet
44, Always accompanied by twin (roll again, characteristics divided between them)
45, Conjoined twin (roll again, characteristics divided between them)
46, Halfling sized on Wednesday night, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday, 12' tall otherwise
47, Follows opposing gods on alternate days
48, Prudish at night, lascivious by day
49, Aquatic by day, air-breather at night
50, Prudish by day, lascivious at night
51, Air-breather by day, aquatic by night
52, Paralyzed on the right side
53, Deformed on the right side
54, Darkness aura one round, blinding light the next
55, Always honest for 5 minutes, then always dishonest the next 5
56, Reckless one round, prudent the next
57, Follows the etiquette of a knight for 5 minutes, then the etiquette of a lady for 5
58, Paired knight and squire--they switch roles every minute
59, Elf on the left, human right
60, Elf left, orc right
61, Always wins initiative, then always loses the next round
62, Veteran (+10 to hit) one round, novice the next
63, Attacks then flees, then attacks, then flees
64, Ugly and then beautiful on alternate rounds
65, Spreads disease one hour, healing aura the next
66, Heat aura left, cold aura right
67, Manic depressive
68, In front of you one round, behind you the next
69, Always inside at night, always outside by day
70, Outside by night, inside by day
71, Invulnerable from the front
72, Invulnerable from the back
73, New armor on the left, ancient and worn armor on the right
74, A wealthy lord for one minute, a beggar for the next
75, Harnishly realistic for one minute, a terrifying enchanted fey creature the next
76, Sleeps for five minutes, awake for five
77, Dual wields: one sword normal, the other held in "icepick" grip
78, Only attacks creatures on the right side
79, Only attacks creatures on the left
80, Alive for 2 rounds, dead for 2
81, Sick for one round, causes sickness the next
82, Blind for one round, causes blindness the next
83, Dead for one minute, death aura the next
84, Drunk for one round, causes drunkenness the next
85, Transposes positions with foe every round
86, Swaps weapons with foe every round
87, Swaps abilities with foe every round
88, Swaps hit point totals with foe every round
89, Swaps goals with foe every round
90, Only takes half damage
91, Deals half damage on one round, then double damage the next
92, Left half undead
93, Left half stone
94, Left half glass
95, Left half glass, right half stone
96, Left half magma
97, Left half ice
98, Left half magma, right half ice
99, Only appears for five minutes at dawn and dusk
100, Left half unarmored body, right half empty armor

In large battles, legions are formed of knights aberrant all possessing the same characteristic and paired with another.

Although the Half-King may or may not, GMs may wish to pair individual half-knight antagonists with partners with half-knights with complimentary vulnerabilities to present more of a challenge.
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Blindheim > Bullywug + Cambion, Heavy

Still redoing the monster manual...

BULLYWUG BLINDHEIM

Page 35 of the 5th ed Monster Manual brings us to the bullywug, a boring petting-zoo-people reskinned goblin which should not exist. They should be replaced with the blindheim, from the old Fiend Folio. It's a frog guy and it looks at you and you go blind because they looked so fucked up.

They are a kind of Slaad--the gods of frogs--and come in all sizes and kinds--any sufficiently pious frog or toad (they aren't biologically distinct) can be transformed into a blindheim via acts of consequential service to their kind.

There is one good detail in the 5e bullywug entry. So they hang out with trained frogs, including giant ones--this isn't the good detail, this is a stupid thing that D&D always does but decent fiction writers and films almost never do where they lump together similarly-derived zoomorphic monsters in a way that would appeal to like a toy collector but in practice only ends up diluting the effectiveness of the archetypal images involved--the good part is that they use the giant toads' gullets to carry stuff, including people. I'm gonna have goblins do that.

CAMBION

The Cambion in classic demonology is like a changeling baby but with succubusses (which is more fun to say than succubi). Ever since at least the original Monster Manual 2 it has always grown up to be yet another generic horned devilperson that can do things like charm or poke you with a spear.

Blah.

Their conception is according to at least one source weird:

1. Succubus fucks guy, gets cum.

2. Succubus gives cum to incubus.

3. Incubus puts cum in human woman.

Between steps 1 and 2 and steps 2 and 3 there are several intriguingly tasteless adventure hooks or hentai plotlines. The only interesting thing I found in research about it after it's born is that it's extremely heavy.

So...

Cambions are not found as adults--as adults they either become full-on demons or grow into tieflings (so you can have PCs whose "parents" are succubusses which is fun). As an encounter, what you get is a gross child between 1 second and 5 years old--generally a punishment for excessive lustfulness.

The Cambion has a fuckton of hit points (82, like it says in the book) and good AC (19, like it says in the book) it bites for like d8+4 damage with its creepy teeth but its main gimmick is heaviness.

It gets heavier the longer it's in one place or in contact with a given creature, and cannot move except of its own volition.

The goes in for the kid-grapple (I would say it charms you into a hug, but I already used that for lava babies)  crawls onto you, begins to bite, and each round grows heavier--the first round it requires a strength save of 18 to stay upright, then 20, then 22 etc. All the while it exerts pressure on the floor equal to an attack with a strength equal to the save--shattering wooden planks, then stone tile, until it begins to be so heavy it will actually pull you into the ground, through all the dungeons of the earth, and down to hell to meet its parents.
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Non-magic Ranger for 5e

Who decided rangers would be magical? Probably it's Gary's fault somehow but whatever...

This is for my hacked version of 5e--like the paladin I made (Knight of Tittivila) it's a non spell-casting ranger and is a bit less powerful overall than the 5e default--but also more straightforward and with less mechanical fiddly bits.

Hit die: d10
Saves: Strength, Dexterity
Skills: Pick 3--Athletics, Insight, Investigation, Nature, Perception, Stealth, Survival(/Tracking)

Level 1
-Favored Enemy: Learn their language (Int check if it's a strange dialect), Advantage on checks, +2 to hit and damage. Categories: Local creatures (incl animals and folkloric creatures), aberrations & elementals, reptiles, fey, giants, plants, undead, any 2 races of humanoids
-Favored terrain: Advantage on info and tracking checks. Pick: Arctic, coast, desert, forest, underdark, mountain, swamp
-Prof bonus +2

2
-Pick one fighting style:
   +2 to hit with bows (archery)
   +1 to AC
    Add ability mod to damage on second hit while using 2 weapons
-Animal companion: You get to pick one animal of 2 HD local to where you are when you level up or to your native environment, it behaves as if Charmed and gains d4 hp per level and is your friend. If it dies you may replace it but you can only have one at a time.
-Prof bonus +2

3
-Advantage to tracking rolls made in any environment
-Automatically succeed on any history, nature, lore etc check about any specific species or place previously observed (once per creature/place). Keep track.
-Prof bonus +2

4
-Add 2 ability score points anywhere
-Any environment you've spent 4 consecutive game sessions in counts as a Favored Terrain
-Prof bonus +2

5
-If the player playing the ranger maps a wilderness area, then, the second time the ranger PC passes through that area (provided at least an hour or one pitched combat has passed--to cleanse the ranger's mind of initial impressions), the ranger PC will automatically notice any concealed or hidden features in that area, and also any changes since last time. A mappy ranger will also notice any differences between a players' map drawn by someone else and the actual landscape and can find food or fresh water in any mapped wilderness terrain within an hour.
-If a ranger spends 15 minutes preparing camouflage, s/he can be unseen in any wilderness environment if not moving and gains advantage to stealth while moving.
-Prof bonus +3

6
-Extra atk per round.
-Choose a second favored terrain.
-Prof bonus +3

7
-Know a single sentence in any language from the area you come from on a successful Int check
-Given an hour and a successful Nature check you can locate berries, fungus, spider glands etc capable of restoring d4 hp to an injured creature. This stuff has to be fresh and goes bad after PC's level # of hours.
-Prof bonus +3

8
-Add two ability score points anywhere
-Given an hour and a successful Nature check you can locate lichens, molds, scorpion sacs etc capable of causing Confusion to a creature that ingests it (ie can't be stabbed in)--it doesn't take effect until the target fails a save (DC is ranger's nature check) and lasts until the target makes another save. The stuff has to be fresh and can't be used after PC's level # of hours.
-Prof bonus +3

9
-You may calm any animal or animal-minded creature with a successful Animal Handling check.
-Outdoor difficult terrain (unless magical) does not slow you.
-When outdoors, your passive and active perception allows you to notice features that would usually only be findable on a careful search.
-Prof bonus +4

10
-On a successful Survival check you can leave no trail and go undetected without magic.
-Growl can cause save vs Fear ( DC: 8+prof mod+Wis mod.) in animals of 5hd or less.
-Prof bonus +4

11
-You cannot be surprised in your preferred terrain.
-Choose a second favored enemy from any form of creature you have met in the campaign.
-Prof bonus +4

12
-If you spend at least 3 rounds setting up an ambush, everyone in your party gets an extra non-attack, non-spell action during the surprise round.
-Prof bonus +4

13
-After a round of study where you take no action, you can trip or disarm any foe on your next successful attack.
-If you roll maximum damage with any weapon, the blow lands exactly where you want.
-Prof bonus +5

14
-Add 2 more ability score points anywhere
-Prof bonus +5

15
-You may make any animal-intelligence creature you encounter of your level HD or less your companion (as level 2 otherwise). Mutant lion, dinosaur, whatever. You can only have one companion at a time, though.
-Prof bonus +5

16
-You cannot be surprised outdoors.

-You cannot be tracked outdoors.
-Prof bonus +5

17
-Add 2 ability score points
-Prof bonus +6

18
-You speak the language of any animal on a successful Nature check.

-Prof bonus +6

19
-Add 2 ability score points anywhere.
-Prof bonus +6

20
-Double damage against your favored enemies.
-Prof bonus +6

Sailing on the Sea of Night

Though its atmosphere is round, the Earth is a cube.

It floats half-submerged, in the Sea of Night and spins slowly--one rotation every 24 hours.

It is said that if you can reach an edge of the cube at dusk with a ship, you can slide off the cube and onto the Sea of Night, at which point you can sail (beneath an ever-present but increasingly distant sun) out to distant positions (discoverable by certain charts, said to be deep in the vaults of Gaxen Kane, whose founders stole the sickle moon to use as a boat) where one can dive for stars--or else continue to sail to the great and palisaded islands where dwell the gods of all present things.

The elder gods (such as the great and tentacled She Who Sleeps And Her Dream Is The Sea) came to us via a process nearly opposite. Since (as anyone in a dungeon might tell you) all things seek the center of the cube via the process called gravity, they swam from the stars, up through the Sea of Night, into the oceans of the cube where they were bound by the magic of the First Reptile Empire.

It is not known how the stars maintain positions so distant from the Cube, at least not by humans. Anaximenes claims they are distant discs, hewn from gold.

And now, a word from our sponsor:

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Some news before the meat of the post:

Review

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I feel as someone who is a part of this community and a game designer to acknowledge the importance of this thing.  You should know it, and the rest of us, too....Blue Medusa goes way, way beyond Deep Carbon and Pleasant Land.  

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A question from a perplexed soul that readers might help answer:

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 ...how on earth is a party of 4 level 5 characters supposed to survive this?!

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Now, on to a D&D widget:

Unusual Animals Available in the Market Today...

(in a big city, d4-1 of these will be available on any given day, in a small town, d4-3)

Roll d20

1, Lucky Chicken--This chicken is lucky. Survives danger like it has 12 hit points. 5gp.

2, Riding Goat--Trained by goblins, dyed with purple spots. Does an extra +1 damage on a gore or a bite (otherwise as wardog) but if you run into any goblins and they make a check they might get it to respond to their commands. 20gp.

3, Escape Goat--If a goat should slay a troll, it inherits the victim's regeneration abilities. This is one such individual--it regenerates at d4hp per round. 200gp.

4, Sexy Hawk--God you look good with that hawk on your shoulder. +2 charisma when attempting seduction. 60gp.

5, One-eyed Hawk--First it's a bargain second it's secretly mega-obedient, like collie obedient. (-2 Wisdom/Perception checks). 20gp.

6, Marbling horse--Or at least that's what the idiots here call it. It's actually half-zebra (thus: a zorse or zebroid)--tawny with thin black stripes. As medium warhorse, just more interesting -400gp.

7, Squealing mule--Shrieks bloody fucking murder whenever anyone comes near it with drawn steel. Probably useful if adventurers park it outside a camp or dungeon--complete pain for anyone else. Cheap-- 10gp

8, Adolescent panther--Not in any sense trained. At all. 4hd. 450gp. 475 with cage.

9, Messenger pigeon--Pretty good at its job. 10gp.

10, Truffle pig--Finds truffles! Never go hungry! Ok, kind of: truffles are low on nutritional value but make rations tastier. Assume a week's rations last 20

5 longer per truffle found. 20gp

11, Riding boar--Trained by dwarves, fur spiked with lard. . Does an extra +1 damage on a bite (otherwise as wardog) but if you run into any dwarves and they make a check they might get it to respond to their commands. 20gp.

12, Paranoid songbird--Sings pretty much only when unfamiliar creatures are nearby. Unlike the squealing mule, the intruder is unlikely to realize the bird is acting as an alarm. 10gp.

13, Canary--great for detecting poison gas. 1gp.

14, Oddspotted newt--this rare, tiny, small, fragile, brightly-colored species survives by immediately crawling into the darkest narrowest place it can find. Good for finding hidden seams in the architecture. 400gp.

15, Eastern leopard-cat--merchant selling it just thinks it's a fancy domestic cat left by sailors from Yoon-Suin. Which it is. However, it also has literally nine lives. Well, eight. It used one getting here. 10gp.

16. Frog prince--Appears to be simply a fascinating, indigo-patterned frog, medium-sized. Unbeknownst to the merchant it is frog royalty--other frogs, toads, bullywugs, blindheims, slaads and batrachians of all kinds will defer to it and pay it homage. 8gp.

17. Thrusting pheasant--Trained to peck and chase anything smaller than itself. Does no damage but irritating enough to grant advantage to anyone else attacking the same target. Allegedly bred for fairy-catching. 10gp.

18. Blue-sided viper--1 hp, save or take 2d20. Not trained or trainable. Handle with care. 300gp.

19. Amusing bunny--overweight and dalmatian-spotted, it loves to gambol, hop and romp. Anyone possessed of such a bunny will be at advantage to charisma checks of the sort where a basically decent person tries to determine if you yourself are a decent person. 5gp.

20. Literal skillmonkey--likely a variety of capuchin, it has either pick locks (1-2) or pick pockets (3-4) as a 3rd level thief focusing on those skills in whatever system, Dex 17 for these purposes. 125gp.

Knight of Tittivila

Knight of Tittivila (Paladin variant)

This is for my hacked version of 5e--it's a non spell-casting paladin and is a bit less powerful overall than the 5e default--but also more straightforward and with less mechanical fiddly bits. You can make paladins of any number of gods by switching out the Tittivila-specific bits.

Knights of Tittivila--goddess of flesh and change--are found among many human and nonhuman races, including the Saurians of Nyctopolis.

Hit die: d10

Saves: Wisdom, Charisma

Skills: Pick 2--Athletics, Insight, Intimidation, Medicine, Persuasion, Religion, Animal Handling

Level 1

Detect Evil/Good # of times/day=Cha mod. 60 ft

Lay on Hands: Heal 5 pts total per day or cure disease or mundane curses by trading in 5 pts. +1 per level

Prof bonus +2

2

Mounted combat (+2 to attack from a horse or other mount)

Smite: Once/day. Add damage to a strike against any creature that is explicitly blasphemous to Tittivila or which has grievously harmed your friends. The damage is +d6 plus d6 extra per (true) friend harmed by the creature. Max d6s=Paladin level, up to a max of 10. If the paladin knowingly "games" this ability Tittivila won't grant it.

Prof bonus +2

3

Add 2 ability score points anywhere

Prof bonus +2

4

Advantage vs disease. No disease can kill you.

Advantage to hit vs creatures that are not flesh (undead, constructs etc).

Prof bonus +2

 5

Add two ability score points anywhere.

Once per day you can turn undead. Save DC: 8+prof mod+Wis mod.

Prof bonus +3

6

Extra atk per round.

Once/day as an automatic action deliver a baleful mutation to any enemy willingly touching you..

Prof bonus +3

7

Any ally within 15' gains same advantages to saves as you.

Half damage from necrotic sources.

Advantage vs paralysis or holding etc.

Prof bonus +3

8

You can call out a creature with an oath--you may only attack that creature until it is dead after doing so, but you will do an extra d10 of damage on a successful strike. If it escapes, you must pursue it alone until it is dead and may attack no other unless it explicitly bars the way. Breaking the oath makes you a fighter of -2 levels.

Prof bonus +3

9

Add two ability score points anywhere

Advantage vs fear

Prof bonus +4

10

Advantage vs Charm or mind control

Advantage vs  Divine magic

Cause save vs Fear ( DC: 8+prof mod+Wis mod.) in creatures of 5hd or less that are antithetical to Tittivila

Prof bonus +4

11

Immune to baleful transformations of your body.

Your mount is semi-intelligent and cannot be slain off-screen. It gains d4 hp each time you level up.

Prof bonus +4

12

Smite damage dice raised to d8.

Prof bonus +4

13

Immune to fear, as are any allies within 15'

Any foe touching your skin must save or take a baleful mutation  Save DC: 8+prof mod+Wis mod.

Prof bonus +5

14

Add 2 more ability score points anywhere

Prof bonus +5

15

Once/day you can end any baleful spell effect on anyone.

Prof bonus +5

16

Creatures antithetical to Tittivila are at disadvantage to hit you and cannot physically touch you (constructs, undead, demons, evil summoned beings, etc)

Prof bonus +5

17

Add 2 ability score points

Prof bonus +6

18

Aura protection (granting advantage to saves) extends to 30'

Prof bonus +6

19

Add 2 ability score points anywhere.

Prof bonus +6

20

1/day all foes within 30' must save or suffer a baleful mutation. Any foe touching the knight will suffer it with no save.

Prof bonus +6

Here you go. It's nominated in 5 categories.

Nyctites Are...

Nyctites are benighted--not fallen but failed souls, collateral damage in divine conflicts. A Nyctite is what happens when you are granted immortality by a god that then dies.

The body and essence of the ex-saint go on as promised--bound to each other, but bound also to empty concepts, they are not undead, but their ability to grow and change is held forever in a trauma of psychoclastic stasis.

Everything they believed is wrong, and they hold to it, molding themselves into a negative image of it--like a fossil formed by the piled shells of parasitizes and dirt.

 

Nyctites form, in aggregate, nuclear shadows of their absent gods formed in the awful convulsion of the Nyctocaustic event. Ever-seeking derelicts of belief, they are curious about everything, but have faith in nothing. Unwilling to cede the personal power derived from conglomerated ideas they now know haven't worked for eons, their restlessness might render them true artists if only they could commit to anything long enough to get something done. As is, their projects are curiously incomplete.

Nyctites take care never to obey the strictures and superstitions and homilies of their former lives, even incidentally--Nyctites of Unamm-Tathra, Lord of Fists never raise their hand as dawn is breaking and never strike a blow, Nyctites of Ferox the Incinerator avoid ecstasies during electrical storms and look askance at reptiles thatmove by night, Nyctites of the Mistress of Sacs never drink from anything larger than their own heads.

Likewise their abilities are dominated by the theme of lacunae--a Nyctite possesses access to divine magic and abilities as a Paladin or Cleric of the level they were when their god fell, however:

-they have access to any spell that their canonizing god would never have granted during its lifetime

-they have access only to those spells

-they may use as many as they want per day

-they may never use the same spell twice

 Typical Nyctite

AC: 12 (semi-substantial)
Hit points: 25 (as 5th level Cleric)
Saving Throws: Everything but Wisdom
Damage Immunities: Necrotic damage, Radiant damage

Vulnerabilities: Double damage from domains associated with their former master

Atk: +5 By weapon type (whatever weapon would be blasphemous in their dead religion)

Abilities: Any cleric spell up to 3rd level that would violate their former faith at will, never the same spell twice

This adventure-- Galleries of the Nyctites --features Nyctites of a slain nature god, possibly Rallathil.

Touchers, Bastards, Expeditionary Gourmets, etc

Some organizations...

Cult of the Cold White Flame

These elves think that life (as in the actual years) comes from a common fuel (the fat of Istykk, the first beast) and that each life is a flame burning up this fuel. So over time they evolved from sort of Greenpeace on steroids into a full-on assassin cult and then into a going concern. They take young elves from their cradles at the age of 50 and train them to, for a modest fee, take life unworthy of life, leaving more for the worthy. A formidable political force at this time.

The Hundred Utter Bastards

Illegitimate offspring of the Negatsar, clockwork lord of the Chaos Wastes. Spymasters all, immortal, immobile and alcoholic.  Each knows one word of the sentence that would undo the world. They communicate via pastries containing missives.

The Scattered House

Originating in the Exotic East, these seekers gather arcane wisdom from all nations. No member may stand in the presence of another and live--a bylaw which contributes to their organization's global reach. Their surreptitious and labyrinthine scroll caches are guarded by mechanisms and things without minds.

The Touchers

Formally called the Haptic League. A society of enthusiasts, collectors of sensations. It is said that, in aggregate, they have touched all things, from the ears of the Bloat Leviathan to the hidden lips of Agricola Pork, the Foaming Slut. Their various archives include not only descriptions rich in the language of the tactile, but detailed (if less ecstatic) records of sources and methods exploited in order to accomplish members' more audacious feats of palpation.

The Catafalque

Art historians and literary critics--mostly male, mostly gay, mostly human, mostly native to Vornheim, mostly upper class, secretly dedicated to protecting the city-state from the depredations of foreign intrigue, generally on cultural grounds, but occasionally also in the interest of preserving the city-state's relatively (very relatively) egalitarian traditions. Kind of based on the Cambridge spies, but nicer. Usually. To locals. 

Temple of Quiet Sliding

Briefly mentioned in Mei Lung Chen-Shan-Tien-Kung-Te and Michael Pondsmith's Kara-Tur Volume I, these esoteric geometers believe that by initiating certain subtle spiritual and geological realignments they will bring about….something. No one knows. They spread their doctrine through a curiously absorbing form of shadow-puppet theatre known as The Anathra and are masters of the sinuous and deadly arts of the Sleeping Hook.

Pitchkit and the Fuckwads

A mercenary company of ill-repute, consisting of the titular Pitchkit--a fighter deeply eloquent in the saltfish poetry of the lower city, a traitorous thief, an arrogant wizard, a drunken dwarf,  a sanctimonious cleric, and the inimitable Gutboy Barrelhouse. They carry a dizzying variety of dull but useful magical items, advance at exactly the same rate as the player characters and are fond of choosing the same targets. At the first sign of genuine trouble, Pitchkit will flee and attempt to recruit new Fuckwads to fit the roles of his soon-to-be-departed comrades.

Pack Slathering

987 gnolls of the fearsome subpolar strain, now led by Heavy Sister and Twinspine. Tales of the pack have driven children home before dusk for three generations. They eat whatsoever they behold and weaponize whatever they can't digest. They wield barbed whips of entrails, howl from mountain peaks, and love naught but gold and Demogorgon.

Société Gustatifs

These gourmets of the Upper City bankroll expeditions to all edges of the cube--from the cliffside inns of the frozen Kraal to the renowned and sweltering breakfisheries in Drownesia's Bay of Ugly Fathers--in order to maintain and update their esteemed Guide de Cuisson et Tavernes dans le Monde Entier. Their monomaniacal project is to leave no recipe unrecorded, no rarity untasted, no chef uninterviewed and no tavern unrated. Contracts from the Société are well-paid and highly prized, and parties hoping for a commission must possess the survival skills necessary to reach the uncharted eateries at the edges of the world, as well as at least one member able to read and write and at least one whose palate is refined enough to pass the formidable Test of Seven Sauces.

The Unmated Glove

A alliance of theatrical advocates, intercessionary priests, pig whisperers, trial gladiators and other lawyers dedicated to increasing demand for their own services via the covert and widespread initiation of personal catastrophes among possible clients. Their agents (known as Ruiners) move fences, dry wells, destroy marriages, embezzle funds, frame partners and generally make life arbitrarily difficult among such classes as are able to hire professional legal representation. As their activities are profoundly illicit and the variety of contests required by different branches of Vornheim law are near infinite, the organization's members have both the motivation and the skillset necessary to resist nearly any attempt to unmask them.

Die Zitterspinnen

Depraved sensualists enamored of spider-choked orgies and casual mutilation. Dedicated collectors of rare silks, expensive pornography and human medical novelties, inciters of weird boners. Remarkably persistent, associated with blackmail schemes and old scandals, suspected of alliances with Nephilidia and/or the cults of Lolth, possibly just callous and very kinky.

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New Gods, New Clerics, New Death and Dismemberment Table

A pair of new tools. short on poetic description but the in-game effects should be noticeable and fun. Written 5e-style but pretty adaptable.

Some New Gods with their Cleric powers...

Domain of Mariah

It is said she sang, and that all that is left of her incarnation is a fragment of stomach, turned to stone.

1st Level

-Bonus proficiency in performance & persuasion.

-Faerie Fire 1/day.

2nd Level

-Advantage vs light & sound effects

6th Level

-Advantage vs illusions, cannot be Silenced.

8th Level

-Reflect radiant or sound damage back on attacker 1/day.

14th Level

-.Bonus radiant, sonic, or illusion spell of any level you can cast (from any spell list).

17th Level

-Reflects all radiant damage, half damage from sound atks.

Ecstasy of Mariah:

In exchange for one extra illusion, radiant or sonic spell on a given day, a cleric of Mariah can enter an ecstasy whereby she must sing continuously for the next 48 hours. The ecstasy can only be undertaken in an immediately dangerous environment.

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Domain of the Black Grip (Clerics of the Death God, Mot--stolen from Evan E)

He is the Great Swallower, indiscriminate, patient. The Heir to all things.

1st Level

-Bonus proficiencies in Medicine.

-Mindless undead of your level HD or less will not attack you if there is any other available target on your side.

2nd Level

-Feign death 1/day.

6th Level

-Undead must make a Wis save (your Wis is DC) to harm you.

8th Level

-Control HD of undead=Wisdom mod.

14th Level

-Bonus necromantic spell of any level you can cast (from any spell list)

17th Level

-Immune to level drain and advantage vs any necrotic damage.

-.Bonus radiant, sonic, or illusion spell of any level you can cast (from any spell list).

17th Level

-Reflects all radiant damage, half damage from sound atks.

Devotions of Mot:

In exchange for one extra necrotic or healing spell on a given day, a cleric of the Black Grip will only be able to metabolize the flesh of intelligent humanoids for the next 7 days. The extra spell will only be granted in an immediately dangerous environment.
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Other Cleric paths:

White-Lipped Goddess

Vorn
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Zak's Death and Dismemberment Table

This is largely based on Trollsmyth's classic Death & Dismemberment table. It's just adapted for 5e, throws some love at the Medicine skill instead of helmets (because: 5e) and is more detailed (because hey, d100 tables are fun). It's pretty easy to convert to other stuff.

One page version here thanks to Carl in the comments...

How it works:

If you fall below 1 hp, roll d100 (-5 for every point under zero, max -95). Losing a body part you don't have means instant death (so the more mutilated you become the more dangerous combat is). Medicine check DCs are 15.

1 or lower--Instant and demoralizing death. Allies Wis save or be stunned for one round.

2 Instant death

3-10 Internal injuries.  Die in # of rounds equal to die roll unless magic brings you above zero and even then you're at disadvantage on everything physical. A month to recover without 3rd level Cure or better.

11 Internal injuries. Die in 10 minutes unless magic brings you above zero (with disadvantage on physical checks). A month to recover without 3rd level Cure or better.

12 Die in 15 minutes unless magic etc…

13 Die in 20 minutes unless magic etc…

14 Die in 25 minutes unless magic etc…

15 Die in 30 minutes unless magic etc…

16-17 Internal injuries.  Die in 15 minutes unless Medicine check is made before your next turn or magic brings you above zero. Medicine check puts you at 1 hp with a Con save vs 18 each round to keep conscious (with disadvantage on physical checks)--a month to recover without magic.

18 Die in 20 minutes unless Medicine etc…

19 Die in 25 minutes unless Medicine etc...

20 Die in 30 minutes unless Medicine etc...

21 Lost left leg die in d4 minutes unless magic brings you above zero or successful Medicine check. Medicine check puts you at 1 hp with a Con save vs 16 each round to keep conscious (-5 dex for lost limb). Two weeks to recover without magic but even then yr still missing a limb.

22 Lost right leg die in d4 minutes unless…

23 Lost left arm die in d4 minutes unless...

24 Lost right arm die in d4 minutes unless...

25 Lost left leg below knee die in 30 minutes unless magic brings you above zero or successful Medicine check puts you at 1 hp with a Con save vs 14 each round to keep conscious (-3 dex  for mangled limb). Week to recover without magic but even then you're maimed.

26 Lost right leg below knee die in 30 minutes unless…

27 Lost right arm past elbow die in 30 minutes unless...

28 Lost left arm past elbow die in 30 minutes unless...

29 Lost left foot Con save vs 14 each round to keep conscious until successful Medicine check (puts you at 1hp) or healed above 0 (-2 dex for missing appendage). d4 days to recover without magic but even then you're still maimed.

30 Lost right foot Con save…

31 Lost left hand Con save...

32 Lost right hand Con save...

33 Broken bone in rt foot Con save vs 14 or go unconscious for d4 rnds (or until magically healed), then back to 1 hp and disadvantage on all physical checks.  d4 days to recover without 3rd level Cure or better

34 Broken bone in left foot Con save...

35-36 Broken bone in rt leg Con save...

37-38 Broken bone in left leg Con save...

39 Broken rt hand Con save...

40 Broken left hand Con save...

41-43 Broken ribs Con save...

44-45 Broken pelvis Con save...

46 Skull fracture Con save...

47  Fracture collarbone Con save…

48-57 Unconscious until healed above 0hp or until dc 10+ (-hp number) Medicine check is made, then at 1 hp.

58 Unconscious 5 rounds (or until magically healed), then at 1hp and disadvantage until successful Medicine check

59 Unconscious 4 rounds (or…

60  Unconscious 3 rounds (or...

61 Unconscious 2 rounds (or...

62 Unconscious 1 round (or...

63 Unconscious 5 rounds (or until magically healed) then at 1 hp.

64 Unconscious 4 rounds (or…

65  Unconscious 3 rounds (or…

66 Unconscious 2 rounds (or…

67 Unconscious 1 round (or…

68 Con save (DC 15) or go unconscious for 5 rounds (or until magically healed) then at 1 hp.

69 Con save (DC 15) or go unconscious for 4…

70 Con save (DC 15) or go unconscious for 3…

71 Con save (DC 15) or go unconscious for 2…

72 Con save (DC 15) or go unconscious for 1…

73 Con save (DC 15) or be stunned (only able to defend) for 5 rounds (or until magically healed) then at 1 hp.

74 Con save (DC 15) or be stunned…

75 Con save (DC 15) or be stunned...

76 Con save (DC 15) or be stunned...

77 Con save (DC 15) or be stunned...

78 Lose your nose unless the player decides this makes the pc unplayable in which case be a softie and let them pick a facial feature, 1hp

79 Embarassing injury (permanent) (player's choice) 1hp

80 Lose d6 fingers on right hand (6= just thumb) 1hp

81 Lose d6 fingers on left hand (6= just thumb) 1hp

82 Lose tongue 1 hp

83 Lose left ear 1hp

84 Lose right ear 1hp

85 Lose left eye 1hp

86 Lose right eye 1hp

87 Successful medicine check next round or lose tongue 1hp

88 Successful medicine check next round or lose left ear 1hp

89 Successful medicine check next round or lose right ear 1hp

90 Successful medicine check next round or lose left eye 1hp

91 Successful medicine check next round or lose right eye 1hp

92-93 Str save vs 15 or be knocked down, 1 hp

94 Lose some teeth in an unbecoming place -1 Cha,  1hp

95 Lose a tooth,  1hp

96-Ugly scar -1 Cha,  1hp

97-Scar,  1hp

98-Awesome scar, +1 Cha,  1hp

99-Adrenaline surge, you have d4+1hp then collapse for d6 rounds when the fight ends

00-Adrenaline surge, you have d4+1hp then collapse for d6 rounds when the fight ends plus awesome scar, +1 Cha

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New 3rd Level Spells

Crowdsourced using this thread on Google+. These versions have been edited and sometimes altered. If you aren't in my Google+ circles and want to be just email zakzsmith AT hawtmayle or send me a G+ message asking to be added to my RPG circles--include a link to your Google + page or I will have no idea how to add you. 

3rd level spells

Begone

Wizard

Target: Creature

Save: Wis negates

Target is teleported to a random part of a random adjacent room. (One that is adjacent on the map, not necessarily one that is connected by a doorway.)


Disgorging Insects
Cleric,Druid
Target: 1 Person
Range: 60 feet
Duration: 10 minutes
Save: Wis save negates

Whenever target speaks, a stream of insects comes from his/her mouth, rather than words. This spell renders verbal communication and spell casting impossible.

Egotist's Masquerade

Wizard

Target: all humanoids within 100'

Duration: 1 round/lvl

Save: Wis negates

All creatures within range are cloaked in an illusion that makes them look and sound like you. Unwilling targets get a save to resist.

Hold The Door

Cleric

Duration: 10 minutes/level

Range: touch

All damage that would be dealt to target inorganic object is dealt to target willing person instead. If they die the effect is broken. The object can be up to the size of a cottage.

Jig-Self

Wizard, Witch

Target : self

Duration: 10 minutes

You may separate yourself into (up to) a dozen pieces. You may choose the size and shape of the various sections of self, as long as every side of the removed area, is a flat plane. 

Each removed part remains alive and active, though they possess no qualities beyond what are normally enjoyed. For example, a hand may crawl, but cannot see. An eyeball may see, but not move in any way. A tongue may both taste and grossly wriggle along , but it's not going to hear anything...or jump onto a table (unless it's a really big tongue).

Splitting the brain results in fractional INT beings (e.g.. halve INT for 2 pieces, a third each for 3 and so on). Split skills and languages evenly between the parts.

You may reform the pieces, at any time during the spell duration, so long as all other pieces are within line of sight, e.g. no blocking obstacles. Otherwise, CON save (D.C. 8+number of pieces). Success and reformation occurs centred round brain. Failure indicates permanent separation, requiring Greater Restoration or Regeneration to return to natural state. 

Laschamp’s Swap

Cleric, Wizard

Duration: d6 rounds

Range: 60 feet

Save: If unwilling see below

Target swaps its highest and lowest ability scores. Unwilling targets save on their worst stat.

Lightning Trap

Wizard

Target: Damaging AoE spell

You can cast this spell as a reaction, like feather fall. A damaging AoE spell is halted as soon as it's cast. A fireball is frozen in the earliest stages of explosion, when it is the size of an egg. A lightning bolt is just a neon light frozen down the hallway. This stasis lasts as long as the caster doesn't move.

Nativate

Cleric, Druid, Witch

Target: Disguised or transformed creature

Duration: 1 hour/lvl

Save: Wis negates

The target believes itself to be whatever creature it is disguised as, or transformed into. It loses all memories of its previous life. The cover identity becomes the only identity.

Obsessive Compulsion: Duplication
Wizard, Witch
Target: 1 Person
Range: 120 feet
Duration: Special
Save: Wis save negates

Target must perform their last round action each round untilt hey make a Wis save. If, for whatever reason, the action is not possible, the target tries to duplicate it nevertheless; for instance running into a wall/from a cliff, slashing at an already defeated foe, or going through the motions of casting a spell in case that particular spell is not memorized anymore.

Out of the Frying Pan

Wizard

Teleports the party into a random room in a random dungeon.

Respite

Cleric 

Target: creature or object

Duration: 1 round

Target can ignore some permanent negative effect caused by magic. People who have magically blinded can see. People who have been petrified are flesh and blood. People who have been killed return to life only if they were killed last round.

  

Sleepthief

Cleric

Range: touch

Save: Con negates

Exchange exhaustion levels with your target. If you haven't slept in three days and they're bright as a daisy, now it's the opposite. Unwilling targets get a saving throw.

Sphere of Seclusion
Wizard, Sorceror, Cleric
Area of effect: 30 foot radius around caster
Durations: 1 round/level with concentration

Nothing can leave target area. Not even light and therefore it looks pitch black from the outside. For any observer outside, treat everything within as fully concealed and silenced.

Anything can, however, enter the area, including light and sound. Anybody inside the area can see and hear anything both within and outside the sphere.

The spell will end if more damage is done to the sphere than twice the caster's level in a single blow or by a single (magical) effect. The sphere then shatters and vanishes. The damage can only be applied from the inside.

Strange Attractor

Witch

You create a small voodoo doll. Creatures in the dungeon will be drawn to it and will seek to destroy it. Every ten minutes, roll a wandering monster check for the voodoo doll, and the resultant creature gets a Wis save to resist (unless it is genuinely curious as to where this unsettling feeling is coming from, in which case it may choose to investigate the hunch anyway).

Stretching Hallway

Wizard, witch

Target:Hallway

Duration: 10 minutes.

Pick a point in a hallway. The hallway stretches out from that point becoming longer and non-Euclidean. It effectively becomes 60 feet longer for every caster level.

Unravel

Druid

Target: chimeric creature

Duration: permanent

Save: Con negates

Target chimera separates into its component creatures. (Any creature made from different animals fused together, or anything with multiple heads.) A chimera would become a goat, a wyvern, a lion, and a snake. Tiamat would become five dragons.
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Some New 2nd Level Spells for 5e D&D or Whatever

Crowdsourced using this thread on Google+. These versions have been edited and sometimes altered. If you aren't in my Google+ circles and want to be just email zakzsmith AT hawtmayle or send me a G+ message asking to be added to my RPG circles--include a link to your Google + page or I will have no idea how to add you. 

Adamant Grip

Cleric/Paladin/Wizard/Witch

2/rnds level duration, end as a free action

One handheld item

No save

For the duration 1 handheld item may not be removed from your grip unless you expressly choose to end the effect as a free action. It is held by a kind of magical magnetism, a kinship beyond physical, and functions like a part of your body. If it is a tool or weapon you double your proficiency bonus in its use. If it is a consumable item it will not spoil, shatter, or otherwise ruin in your grip. If it is a shield you may add your shield bonus to your saves. If it is another mundane item or valuable the item will remain in your possession, intact, until you release it, even a string of pearls with a golem tugging on it. If you are magically petrified the item will not be petrified like the rest of your gear.

Dispel magic can override the effect, someone can Command or Charm you into releasing your grip, other magical exceptions apply. Otherwise even great force pulling on the object will be like pulling on your arm, so you can be thrown around by it and ripping the item free would do as much damage as ripping your hand off. 

The item has to be something your character can lift with one hand without becoming encumbered. So you can't attach yourself to an orc or a horse or a cart but you could attach yourself to your magical staff or the reins of your horse and stuff. You can use it to attach yourself to a line (like rope or chain) but it only secures your current handhold, so it's best for stopping falls and such.

I guess you can cast it at higher levels to extend the duration or add +1 to any of the described effects but not both.

Arcane Confluence

Wizard

Range: Special

Target: Two memorized spells

Duration: Special

Casting Time: 1 round

The caster chooses two different memorized spells that will be cast simultaneously in the next round. It becomes effectively a single spell with the worst/lowest duration, area of effect, number of targets of the two spells. If the spells have two different saving throws, the receiver may choose which save to use.

Corpse Mirror

Witch

Range: touch

Area of Effect: 1 mirror

You reach into a mirror and pull out a corpse that looks exactly like you. If anyone uses speak with dead on it, it says the opposite of whatever you would say.

Fragile Egg

Druid, Witch

Casting Time 10 minutes

Range 0

A of Effect-One hollow egg

Duration 2 hours / caster level

This spell creates a hidden space inside a hollowed-out egg, which can hold up to 30 lbs or 3 cubic ft. of material.

The item can be made from the egg of any creature which has previously been carefully emptied and painted with appropriate magical sigils. At the end of the Casting Time the caster places the item(s) desired into the shell.

The caster may not remove any item without breaking the Egg and dispelling the magic. Only non-living, unenchanted items may be stored within, and while there no time passes for them. This allows the storage of cooked food, lit flames and volatile liquids.

The result weighs no more than a normal unhatched egg, and is just as fragile.

When the spell duration runs out, if the Fragile Egg is shattered or the magic Dispelled, everything that was stored inside instantly hatches out. On occasion there may also be found small traces of rich soil and leaves, for reasons unknown.

Ganonball

Range: 50'

Area of Effect: object/creature

Wizard

Make an attack roll against a target creature. They make an attack roll, and if they beat your attack roll, they knock the ganonball back at you. This process repeats until someone fails to beat the previous attack roll, and they get hit in the face with the ganonball, which does d6 for each attack roll made.

I Am You, And You Are She

Wizard, Witch

10 minute duration

30 ft radius sphere

CHA save if aware of spell

Caster randomly swaps around the faces of every living thing (including self) within a 30 ft radius--must be at least 3 creatures. This includes animals. 1 in 20 chance  of gaining some permanent feature of the face briefly worn.



Invisible Candle

Witch, Druid

Range: touch

Area of Effect: you

Duration: 1 round/level of caster

If you hold a light source, its light becomes invisible to anyone except you.

Mortification of the Flesh

Cleric, Witch

Target: Caster

The caster asks his or her God to grant a spell from the cleric's spell list that (s)he is able to cast. To do so, the cleric must flog him/herself. For each d8 of inflicted damage, there is a cumulative 10% chance that the spell will be granted--maximum of 60%. The number of d8's must be chosen before rolling.

Mouse Time

Witch

Range: 10'

Area of Effect: 1 willing creature for every caster level

Reagent: 1 mouse per target, held by you

Duration: 1 round/level of caster

You shrink to mouse size, and the mouse grows to your size. This spell also works on things that are merely mouse-sized.

Precarious Haggling

Wizard, Witch

Range: One object

Duration: 24 hours

The (gp) price of target object is halved, but an additional cost is to be paid as determined by a random roll on a goblin market price list table ( eg. the one on Zak's blog: dndwithpornstars.blogspot.com/2015/10/goblin-market-works-like-this.html ).

The object must be purchased within the next 24 hours or the seller will never sell anything to the caster anymore.

Safe Escape

Wizard 

Duration: instantaneous

Range: caster

Save: none

Teleports the caster 1d1000 feet in a random direction. If this makes the caster appear within something solid they will instead appear within the nearest bit of open space. May result in the caster suffering significant falling damage.

Skein of Fate

Cleric/Wizard/Witch

Range: Line of sight

Area of Effect: 1 creature

Caster roll 2d20--those will be the target creature's next two d20 rolls. Caster doesn't have to tell the target the results if they don't want to.

Staring Contest

Wizard

Range: 50'

Target: 1 creature

A target who meets your gaze must make a save. If they fail, pause the game. You fight the target in a side-combat, 1-on-1. The side-combat takes place inside a spherical room 30' in diameter (located inside your eye). The side-combat ends when someone is reduced to 0 HP. The loser immediately passes out for 1d6 minutes. Damage taken inside the side-combat does not carry over into the real world, but non-bodily effects do (such as insanity, curses, etc).

Till Death Do Us Part

Witch

Range: Line of sight

Target: One creature

Duration: One minute

Target creature and the caster are linked by a magical bond and cannot move away from each other beyond the distance during the spell. The only natural way to disperse the bond is by the death of either one.

Transpose Person

Wizard

Range: 10'/ (At 4th level: line of sight)

Area of Effect: two creatures

Caster and target creature of human-size switch places.

Weretime

Witch, Druid

You turn into a common local animal for 10 minutes. You do not have any control over the creature for the duration. It will behave as a normal creature would.

Wandering Eye 

Witch

Duration: 10 minutes (Concentration)

Range: Touch

Save: None

Components: V,S,M (two small marbles)

The caster's eyeballs and marbles switch places for the duration of the spell. The caster can continue to see out of the eyeballs but not out of the marbles. Each eyeball has 1 HP and AC 8. If the eyeball were to be destroyed, it returns without ill effect to the caster's eye socket.

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Zak's 5e-Hack Character Gen

This is only for first level.

This is mostly here for my reference during character gen or for people asking what I did to change 5e. Includes a lot of minor hacks, biggest ones probably being hit points knocked back to Old School scale and no cantrips.

If you know what class you want: roll stats on 3d6, arrange to taste.

If you don't: roll 3d6 in order, choose class after.

CLASSES:

These index cards are designed to be used by experienced players and new players since we get alotta both at my house:

Alice:

Roll twice on the leveling-up table here

Witch/Warlock:

Roll twice here and once here

Fighter-types are proficient with any weapon. Casters are proficient only with whatever weapons they pick to start with, Rogues/thieves are proficient with whatever they pick to start with plus improvised weapons.

RACES

Parents for tieflings here.

Elf home villages are here.

BACKGROUNDS

only skills and stuff are listed, other changes from default 5e in red

Clergy, nun etc-Insight, Religion, extra language A holy symbol (a gift to you when you entered the priesthood), a prayer book or prayer wheel, 5 sticks of incense, vestments, a set of common clothes, and a belt pouch containing 15 gp

Charlatan-Deception, Sleight of Hand,  A set of fine clothes, a disguise kit, tools of the con of your choice (ten stoppered bottles filled with colored liquid, a set of weighted dice, a deck of marked cards, or a signet ring of an imaginary duke), and a belt pouch containing 15 gp

Criminal-Deception, Stealth, A crowbar, a set of dark common clothes including a hood, and a belt pouch containing 15 gp

Spy-as criminal above, trade out perception for stealth if you want

Entertainer-Acrobatics, Performance, A musical instrument (one o f your choice), the favor of an admirer (love letter, lock of hair, or trinket), a costume, and a belt pouch containing 15 gp

Gladiator-as above, plus add an exotic thrown or hand weapon

Folk Hero-Animal Handling, Survival,A set of artisan’s tools (one of your choice), a shovel, an iron pot, a set of common clothes, and a belt pouch containing 10 gp

Guild Artisan-Insight, Persuasion, A set of artisan’s tools (one of your choice), a letter of introduction from your guild, a set of traveler’s clothes, and a belt pouch containing 15 gp, roll on vornheim business table Random jobs here

Merchant-as guild artisan above Random jobs here

Hermit-Medicine, Religion, A scroll case stuffed full of notes from your studies or prayers, a winter blanket, a set of common clothes, an herbalism kit, and 5 gp

Noble-History, Persuasion,  A set of fine clothes, a signet ring, a scroll of pedigree, and a purse containing 25 gp

Knight-as noble above

Outlander-Athletics, Survival, A staff, a hunting trap, a trophy from an animal you killed, a set of traveler’s clothes, and a belt pouch containing 10 gp

Sage-Arcana, History, 2 extra languages, A bottle of black ink, a quill, a small knife, a letter from a dead colleague posing a question you have not yet been able to answer, a set of common clothes, and a belt pouch containing 10 gp

Sailor-Athletics, Perception, extra language,, A belaying pin (club), 50 feet of silk rope, a lucky charm such as a rabbit foot or a small stone with a hole in the center (or you may roll for a random trinket on the Trinkets table in chapter 5), a set of common clothes, and a belt pouch containing 10 gp

Pirate-as sailor

Soldier-Athletics, Intimidation, An insignia of rank, a trophy taken from a fallen enemy (a dagger, broken blade, or piece o f a banner), a set of bone dice or deck of cards, a set of common clothes, and a belt pouch containing 10 gp

Urchin--Sleight of hand, Stealth, Disguise kit, thieves’ tools, A small knife, a map of the city you grew up in, a pet mouse, a token to remember your parents by, a set of common clothes, and a belt pouch containing 10 gp

EQUIPMENT:

 You have a knife and another melee weapon of your choice and a backpack. If you are a cleric you have a holy symbol, if you're a wizard you have a spellbook.

Roll d20 on this table until you get the same result twice or the table instructs you otherwise

1. Shield or helmet AC +2

2. Leather armor +1

3. Studded/ring mail AC +3 or take leather armor or a cloak and (no matter what you choose) roll d10+9 on this table from now on

4. Scale mail AC +4 or take leather armor or a cloak and (no matter what you choose) roll d10+9 on this table from now on

5. Chain mail AC +6 or take leather armor or a cloak and (no matter what you choose) roll d10+9 on this table from now on

6. Splint mail AC +7 or take leather armor or a cloak and (no matter what you choose) roll d10+9 on this table from now on

7. Plate mail AC +8 or take leather armor or a cloak and (no matter what you choose) roll d10+9 on this table from now on

8. Crossbow w/10 bolts 

9. Roll D20+ charisma mod. DC=15 If you fail, take one thing, if you succeed, choose a number of things off this list equal to the number over 15, then stop.

10. Mirror, wolvesbane or 10' pole

11. 100gp or or thieves' tools

12. 5 torches + 2d4 oils

13. Rope

14. Grappling hook

15. Bedroll + some mundane object smaller than a breadbox not on this table

16. Caltrops or 10' chain

17. Melee weapon of your choice, it may be throwable

18. Short bow w/10 arrows

19. Lantern + 2d4 oils

20. Rations: 1 week +Wineskin

WEAPON LIST:

WHERE ARE YOU FROM?

Roll d20 if you want

Dwarves don't roll here

Dark elves are always from Drownesia or a random hex

1-8 Vornheim if human or half-elf, Chaos Wastes if Half Orc or Tiefling, Gaxen Kane if Goblin, Nornrik if White Elf, The Black Ocean if Sea Elf, Far Lands otherwise

9-11 Elsewhere on the Northern continent

12-14 Hakleth Archipelago

15-16 Voivodja

17 Chaos Wastes

18 Yoon-Suin

19 Southern Continent (like deserts, etc)

20 Random Hex, roll d4-1, d10, d10, d10

FIRST LEVEL SPELLS

New or altered spells in red

CLERIC SPELLS

Bane (-d4 to enemies, Cha save, Concentration up to 1 min)

Bless (+d4 to friends, Cha save, Concentration up to 1 min)

Command (Wis save, any 1 word command)

Create or Destroy Water (10 gallons)

Cure Wounds (d6+wis mod)

Detect Evil and Good (Concentration, up to 10 mins blocked by a foot of stone etc)

Detect Magic (Concentration, up to 10 mins blocked by a foot of stone etc)

Detect Poison and Disease (Concentration, up to 10 mins, blocked by a foot of stone etc)

Inflict Wounds  (d6+wis mod touch attack, verbal component only)

Protection from Evil and Good (concentration up to 10mins, one creature, foes have disadvantage & can't be mentally attacked)

Purify Food and Drink

Sanctuary (1 min, range 30', enemies need wis save to attack, if target attacks, spell ends)

Shield of Faith (60 ft, concentration up to 10 mins, +2 ac)

removed:

Entangle

Guiding Bolt

Healing Word

DRUID SPELLS

Create or Destroy Water (10 gallons)

Cure Wounds (d6+wis mod)

Detect Unnatural (includes monsters and arcane magic--Concentration, up to 10 mins)

Detect Poison and Disease (Concentration, up to 10 mins, blocked by a foot of stone etc)

Entangle (concentration, up to 1 min, str check each rnd to escape, 20ft square)

Faerie Fire (60ft, conc up to 1 min, dex save, everyone has advantage to hit)

Fog Cloud (20 tft radius, heavily obscured, lasts until dispersed by wind etc)

Hunter's Mark (touch or transferred w/weapon, target becomes extremely tasty-smelling to animal-int creature of Druid's choice, 1 hr)

Jump (triple jump distance, 1 minute, cricket legs)

Longstrider (longer legs, +10ft to speed, 1 hr)

Animal Messenger -cause one ordinary animal cat size or smaller to carry a message of any length to anyone

Moon Sickle (hand weapon, lasts 1 min, d6 damage, blinds who it hits for 1 round)

Purify Food and Drink

Shillelagh magic staff does d12 damage lasts 1 min
Skin Chain  (touch a target skin-to-skin. That target becomes glued to the wizard. Anyone touching the target with bare flesh becomes glued to the target and on and on. Concentration)

Speak with Animals (10 mins)

Thorn Whip does d8 damage plus dex save or be disarmed lasts 1 min 

Removed:

Charm Person

Healing Word

Thunderwave

WIZARD/SORCERESS WITCH/WARLOCK SPELLS

Alarm (casting time 1 min, lasts 8hrs)

Charm Person (Wis save at beginning & whenever you ask for something heavy, lasts until save made)

Color Spray (15-ft cone, affects 6d10 worth of creatures, weakest first, blinds for a rnd)

Comprehend Languages (lasts 1 hr, must touch text if written)

Detect Magic (Concentration, up to 10 mins)

Disguise Self (minor illusion, 1 hour, Int check & inspection to defeat)

Drunk Reversal (exchange blood alcohol level of two touched targets)

Expeditious Retreat (2x speed concentration up to 1o mins)

False Life (d4+4 temporary hp, 1 hour)

False Sensation--Cause target to hear or smell an imaginary thing, lasts one round

Feather Fall (1 min,)

Floating Disk (1 hr)

Fog Cloud (20 tft radius, heavily obscured, lasts until dispersed by wind etc)

Grease (10 ft square, permanent )

Hideous Laughter (target lies prone laughing, conc up to 1 min, wis save each rnd, wis sav at adv each time targets hurt, affects 1 target in hearing range)

Identify (takes 1 min to cast)

Illusory Script (writing looks like some other writing up to 10 days to targets of choice)

Mage Armor (ac= 13+dex mod for unarmored ally lasts until next sunrise or sundown)

Mending-Fix a single break in any non-magic inorganic object
Power word vomit: affects all but caster in earshot, con save or throw up lose 1 action

Protection from Evil and Good (concentration up to 10mins, one creature, foes have disadvantage & can't be mentally attacked)

Reduce (Touch, lasts 1 min, shrink 50%)
Skin Chain  (touch a target skin-to-skin. That target becomes glued to the wizard. Anyone touching the target with bare flesh becomes glued to the target and on and on. Concentration)

Shield (+5 bonus to ac in reaction to attack for 1 rnd)

Silent Image (concentration up to 10 mins, illusion, int check + round of investigation to id)

Sleep (20 ft, 5d8 hp of creatures, weakest 1st, no save but wakes easily)

Unseen Servant: (1 hr telekinesis 60 ft)

Removed:

Burning Hands

Jump

Longstrider

Magic Missile

Thunderwave